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GLENN GLASSER was born in Minsk, Russia, the eldest of 17 children of Dora and Chaim Glasserbaumwitz. At age 6, Glasser struck out on his own, emigrating to America as a stowaway on the tramp steamer S.S. Carpathia. Settling on New York’s Lower East Side, Glasser soon caught the eye of vaudeville impresario Roland “Lucky” Kirschmütter. Impressed by Glasser’s rich tenor and impeccable comic timing, Kirschmütter made Glasser a featured performer in his new show, The Ragamuffin Follies of ’28. After a smash two-year run, Glasser left the show to pursue his first love, particle physics. Holing himself up in an upstate New York cabin, Glasser emerged three months later with the first of his many groundbreaking scientific theorems, the Certainty Principle, for which he was awarded the Nobel Prize For Physics. While accepting the award in Stockholm, Glasser was introduced by Sweden’s King Olaf VII to his youngest daughter, Princess Birgit, whom Glasser would later go on to bed. Glasser married Birgit in an intimate mountaintop ceremony attended by such friends as Ernest Hemingway, heavyweight champion Max Baer and the influential neo-dadaist Pieter van der Groot. The couple’s honeymoon was cut short by the outbreak of World War II, during which Glasser logged more than 300 bombing missions in the European theater, including a 1943 direct hit on Josef Goebbels’ summer home that killed Goebbels’ gardener and chef. After the war, with Birgit’s encouragement, Glasser successfully reinvented himself once again, this time as a funk sideman. In 1950, while touring with a then-unknown James Brown, Glasser composed the saxophone riff to “Funky Rooster (Cluck That Thang)”, widely considered the most sampled sax riff in hip-hop history. Glasser divorced Birgit in 1953, an event which ushered in one of the most prodigious starlet-bedding runs in modern sexual-conquest history. Among Glasser’s many lovers, muses, and paramours were Ann-Margret, Susan Sontag, Cheryl Ladd, Mia Farrow, Raquel Welch, Jane Birkin, Jacqueline Onassis, Diana Ross, Maria Callas, Patty Hearst, Charo, Jacqueline Bisset, Mimi Rogers and Madeleine Albright. In addition to being an accomplished singer, physicist, painter, fly fisherman, rumrunner, karate master and cocksman, Glasser also greatly enjoys photography, which has been his primary professional focus for the past 15-plus years. Glasser lives in Williamsburg and Montauk with his carpet dog, Yogi.